


What happens at the cantina

by DarkShadeless



Series: Overseer Sar [42]
Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Legends: The Old Republic
Genre: Humor, Shenanigans, my terrible sense of, pure ridiculousness
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-08-21
Updated: 2018-08-21
Packaged: 2019-06-24 03:27:48
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 624
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15621534
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DarkShadeless/pseuds/DarkShadeless
Summary: Timmns had been so sure he’d win this time.





	What happens at the cantina

**Author's Note:**

> Warning: crack ahead. Ish. This is what happens when you leave me alone with a tub of ice cream and one too many suggestions of- you'll see.
> 
> I was supposed to write an update on Anchor, wrote something else entirely and then decided I still wanted to put a story up. Srsly, I wasn't even going to upload this when I made it into a draft but I reread it and it made me giggle so why the fuck not. :P Have fun.

 

 

Zhellday is cantina day. Every week, like clockwork, Sar will wheedle him into putting away their paperwork and having a night on the town, or at least above the hangar. ‘Just to be sure.’

To be sure of _what_ Somminick hasn’t figured out yet but he’s starting to look forward to their little tradition. There’s nothing more entertaining than ribbing his colleague when he’s buzzed.

“How dare you! I’m a perfect homemaker!”

The Jedi has to admit he’s not quite sober himself. His tongue is definitely starting to loosen, not that he’d let that bit of hyperbole slink past him if it wasn’t. “You can’t cook for druk.”

Sar’s gasp of mortal offense is worthy of a stage. Halfway through he inhales his brandy and starts hacking his lungs out. Master Timmns snorts into his own drink.

“You know, you almost poisoned me last time.“

“That- that was on purpose!”

“Sure it was.”

Yon’s such a terrible liar when there’s nothing but his pride at stake. It’s hilarious. Looks like Somminick’s going to win this round. ~~~~

Or he _would have_ if Rennow hadn’t taken that moment to stop chuckling at their antics and tried to take the mick out of them. “Wow. How long have you two been married?”

Some time ago the Jedi might have bristled under the suggestion. Now he just laughs a little.

Sar doesn't. Laugh, that is. “Six months.”

A startled hush falls over their end of the bar. “Huh.” Gault glances between them. “Shine coming off, is it, eh?”

He isn’t the only one suddenly feeling out of sorts. Timmns’ stomach is clenching uncomfortably and it takes him until his friend huffs a derogatory, “Nah.” to understand why.

_It didn’t ring wrong in the Force._

No more alcohol tonight. At least not for him. “We’re not married,” he clarifies a little more firmly than is perhaps necessary.

Ignoring the Devaronian’s increasingly awkward smirk, Yon turns to give him the side-eye. “You’re the first person I greet most mornings and the last one I say goodnight to. We share each other’s life.”

Timmns… has no idea what to say. They have both blundered before, culturally. Has he- he couldn't have- _oh Force_.

Slowly, Sar’s jaw sets. “If you divorce me, I’m suing for custody. Just so you know.”

_What in the name of the center of the galaxy._

“We don’t have children!”

“Well, what do _you_ call the dozen-odd brats we’re looking after?”

That seems to be too much for Rennow. “Right. So, nice chat and all, I’ll just be going now.“ He takes off in a move Timmns dearly wishes he could replicate because _he doesn’t have an answer_.

For a breathless second he replays their time together, looking for the hints he has missed and –

Sees the glint in Sar’s eye. “You _bastard_.”

His friend’s steely façade cracks to make way for a shit-eating grin. “It’s in your head now, innit?”

“ _Why are you doing this to me?_ ”

“I’m a dread lord of the Sith. And I’ve just caught up! You’re paying the tab, sucker, congratulations.”

 

 

\---

 

 

 _The look on Somminick’s face._ Priceless.

Sar will have a laugh at this for _weeks_. His Jedi really should know better than to fall for such a transparent ruse. Seems someone has neglected to keep up with the cultural exchange program. Warriors don’t _marry_.

Duty calls, they follow. Swearing you’ll always put someone first when that’s obviously a lie is more than anyone’s honor can endure, surely.

_What a warrior does do is claim shield brothers, or sisters. Those they can trust to have their back, on and off the battlefield._

Well, Sar won’t be the one to point that out, giving Timmns one heart attack a day is more than enough.

 

 


End file.
